Neuroshambles

This week, Mark is joined once again by the brilliant Kieran Rose, AKA The Autistic Advocate – writer, educator, and parent of three neurodivergent children. Together, they take a deep (and sometimes uncomfortable) dive into one of the most contentious topics in neurodiversity parenting: labels.
What do we mean when we describe someone as “severely autistic”? Why is it so hard to explain what being autistic actually means? And how useful (or harmful) are terms like high-functioning, low-functioning, profound autism, or even Asperger’s?
In a wide-ranging and compassionate chat, Mark and Kieran explore how complex, deeply personal and often contradictory this topic is - both for parents and for autistic people themselves. What starts as a provocative question ends up as a fascinating conversation about diagnosis, co-occurring conditions, identity, education, eugenics, power, and prejudice.
Not one to miss. Make a cuppa, maybe two - this one’s long. But worth it.
📍 CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):
00:00 - Intro: Meet Kieran Rose
04:30 - Life in a Fully Neurodivergent Household
08:00 - Topic of the Week: How Autistic Is Your Child?
12:00 - Labels, Bias, and the Stigma Around Autism
18:00 - High vs Low Functioning: Where It Comes From
23:00 - What Even Is Autism?
28:30 - The Flawed Legacy of Asperger’s
35:00 - Identity vs Diagnosis
42:00 - DSM-5 Levels of Autism: Why They Don’t Work
49:00 - Profound Autism and The New York Times Article
55:00 - A Counterpoint: The Voices We Don’t Hear
1:00:00 - Co-occurring Conditions and the Real Source of Needs
1:07:00 - Clinical Labels vs Lived Experience
1:14:00 - Mark’s Imposter Syndrome as an Autism Parent
1:18:00 - What’s the Alternative?
1:23:00 - Final Thoughts: Humanising, Not Diagnosing
1:27:00 - Neurodiversity Champions
1:33:00 - Tiny Epic Wins
1:39:00 - “What the Flip?” Moments
1:43:00 - Wrap-up & Where to Find Us
🔗 LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
Kieran Rose website - https://theautisticadvocate.com/
Eugenics - https://www.newscientist.com/definition/eugenics/
Asperger Syndrome - https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/what-is-autism/the-history-of-autism/asperger-syndrome
Hans Asperger - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hans_Asperger
Lorna Wing - https://www.autism.org.uk/what-we-do/news/lorna-wing-an-autism-hero
DSM-5 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DSM-5
PDF Download of DSM-5 - https://ia800707.us.archive.org/15/items/info_munsha_DSM5/DSM-5.pdf
New York Times article: The Autism Spectrum Is Too Broad - https://www.nytimes.com/2025/10/16/opinion/autism-diagnosis-category-stigma.html
Greta Thunberg - https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-49918719
What is monotropism? - https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/professional-practice/what-is-monotropism
Ehlers Danlos Syndromes - https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/ehlers-danlos-syndromes/
Communication First - https://communicationfirst.org/
Autism Central - https://www.autismcentral.org.uk/
Kieran Rose Animated Guide to Monotropism - https://youtu.be/qUFDAevkd3E?si=diwlbe4AHRcxfjQF
Kieran Rose Animated Guide to The Double Empathy Problem - https://youtu.be/qpXwYD9bGyU?si=7bnGR2UsrCgLa_hL
 
KIERAN'S HOMEWORK
Kieran Rose Blog: Autism, it’s Labels and the Language of Pathologising Rhetoric - https://theautisticadvocate.com/autism-its-labels-and-the-language-of-pathologising-rhetoric/
Sunday Times article: Extra time in exams ‘unhealthy’ for children with ADHD and autism - https://www.thetimes.com/uk/education/article/extra-time-exams-unhealthy-children-adhd-autism-k820s56zh
TES magazine article: Sami Timimi: Why ‘invented’ SEND labels are disabling pupils - https://www.tes.com/magazine/teaching-learning/general/sami-timimi-interview-problems-with-send-diagnosis-adhd-autism
Yahoo News: Badenoch says motability cars not for people with ADHD - https://uk.news.yahoo.com/badenoch-motability-cars-not-people-135341300.html?guccounter=1
📣 CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles
🎙️ CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

This week, Mark is joined by Michelle Parton – a long-time Neuroshambles listener and parent of two neurodivergent children. They explore one of the more baffling challenges of raising our kids: why do so many of them flat-out refuse medical assistance?
From hiding lava lamp injuries to meltdown-inducing blood tests, Mark and Michelle swap tales of their kids’ iron-willed resistance to all forms of treatment – even when they’re clearly in pain, bleeding, or itching uncontrollably. Together, they explore the many reasons this might be happening – from sensory issues and PDA to past trauma, masking, and a fundamental lack of trust in strangers in latex gloves.
It’s funny, cathartic, at times heartbreaking – definitely one for anyone who’s ever tried (and failed) to administer Calpol to a deeply suspicious neurodifferent child.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):
00:00 – Intro & Meet the Guest: Michelle Parton
03:00 – Topic of the Week: Refusing Medical Help
08:00 – Kids hiding injuries
13:00 – Dysregulation about the prospect of going to the doctor
17:30 – Trust issues with medical professionals
23:00 – Lyme disease and the unholy nightmare of blood tests
29:00 – Trying to administer medication
35:00 – The impact of sensory overwhelm: Plasters, creams & the taste of medication
42:00 – The added complication with PDA kids
47:00 – The role that masking might play
54:00 – How alexithymia and interoception can influence things
59:00 – The impact of past traumatic experiences
1:04:00 – The positives
1:06:00 – Neurodiversity Champions
1:10:00 – Tiny Epic Wins
1:14:00 – “What the Flip?” moments
1:18:00 – Wrap-Up & Where to Find Us
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
Lyme Disease - https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/lyme-disease/
Alexithymia - https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cg4ky5qgrlpo
Interoception - https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/professional-practice/interoception-wellbeing
Beyond Creative Education - https://www.beyondcreativeeducation.org.uk/
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CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles
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CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com
 

In part two of this deep dive into transitions, Mark reunites with author, trainer, and neurodiversity advocate Pete Wharmby to look at more reasons they can cause such a monumental challenge for autistic, ADHD and PDA kids (and adults).
From difficulties pulling our kids away from screen-time and replacing a broken fridge, to the regular flashpoint of brushing teeth, Mark and Pete share real-life strategies that can make these transitions more manageable - or at the very least a bit more fun.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):
00:00 - Welcome back and reintroducing Pete Wharmby
02:30 - Recap of what we covered in episode 45 and why transitions affect all neurodivergent kids
06:10 - Screen time, flow states and Pete's oil tanker analogy
16:45 - The role that monotropism plays in transitions
27:00 - Strategies: lead-In Times, choice and routines
36:40 - Understanding how PDA affects transitions and why it’s not just defiance
46:00 - Strategies for control-driven transitions (e.g. declarative language)
55:30 - Difficulty throwing stuff away: fridges, crocs and clinging to familiarity
1:04:30 - Schools as the perfect storm of transitional triggers
1:15:20 - The positives
1:18:00 - Neurodiversity Champions
1:20:40 - Tiny Epic Wins
1:23:15 - "What the flip?" moments
1:26:00 - Wrap-up and thanks
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
Pete Wharmby website - https://petewharmby.com/
Untypical by Pete Wharmby - https://amzn.eu/d/8gGK6v4
What I Want to Talk About, by Pete Wharmby - https://amzn.eu/d/6tY0kZQ
What is monotropism? - https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/professional-practice/what-is-monotropism
Last One Laughing - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LOL:_Last_One_Laughing_UK
Ausome Training, Cothu course - https://ausometraining.com/cothu-with-pete-wharmby
Declarative language - https://lifeskillsadvocate.com/blog/declarative-language-for-neurodivergent-communicators/
Anna Freud - https://www.annafreud.org/
Georgia Pavlopoulou (LinkedIn) - https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-georgia-pavlopoulou-651a042a
Neuro Nook Storytime - https://www.neuronookstorytime.com/
Bedknobs and Broomsticks - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bedknobs_and_Broomsticks
Silksong - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hollow_Knight:_Silksong
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CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles
⸻
CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay

This episode of Neuroshambles, will resonate will all parents of neurodifferent kids, as Mark discusses difficulties with transition with the wonderful autism advocate, Pete Wharmby. Together, they delve into the messy, stressful, and often misunderstood world of transitions – from seemingly small everyday routines to major life changes.
Whether it’s leaving the house, going into school, or prying them away from screen time, transitions can often be a sensory, emotional and logistical nightmare for autistic, ADHD and PDA kids (and adults). But why exactly are they so hard – and what can we do to ease the load?
This is a funny, heartfelt, and cathartic episode full of insight, compassion and practical suggestions, as well as a much-needed sense of solidarity for anyone who’s ever dreaded their kids being invited to a birthday party.
—
CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):
00:00 – Intro and why this is only part one
03:30 – Meet the guest: Pete Wharmby
12:00 – Transitions: What they are and why they’re so difficult
19:00 – Fear of the unknown
25:00 – Why birthday parties can be so anxiety-inducing
32:00 – Strategies for smoother transitions to the unknown
40:00 – School and powerlessness
48:00 – Holidays, Google Earth and visual planning
55:00 – Fear of the Known: Why school can feel like a punishment
1:03:00 – Processing struggles and instruction overload
1:13:00 – Fixable triggers and simple (free) accommodations
1:20:00 – The double-edged sword of hyperfocus
1:24:00 – Neurodiversity Champion: Fight For Ordinary
1:26:30 – Tiny Epic Wins
1:29:00 – What the Flip? Moments
1:33:00 – Wrap-up and tease for part 2
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION:
Pete Wharmby website - https://petewharmby.com/
Untypical by Pete Wharmby - https://amzn.eu/d/8gGK6v4
What I Want to Talk About, by Pete Wharmby - https://amzn.eu/d/6tY0kZQ
Fight for Ordinary - https://disabledchildrenspartnership.org.uk/fight-for-ordinary/
Google Maps Street View - https://www.google.com/streetview/
Google Earth - https://earth.google.com/web/
Ordnance Survey Maps - https://shop.ordnancesurvey.co.uk/
Albion In The Community - https://bhafcfoundation.org.uk/
Monotropism and Autism Theory - https://monotropism.org/
Interoception - https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/professional-practice/interoception-wellbeing
—
CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles
—
CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

In this episode of Neuroshambles, Mark Allen is joined by devoted dad and fellow Neuroshambler Mark Holborow, for a refreshingly honest look at the difficulties of holding down a job, while raising neurodivergent kids and trying (often unsuccessfully) to keep those two worlds from colliding.
They discuss naked Zoom call interruptions and the emotional labour of school drop-offs, as well as the guilt, the resilience, and the accidental skillsets parents of ND kids develop.
It’s a cathartic, relatable deep dive into the realities of navigating employment when your home life is anything but typical – with plenty of laughs, rants, and candid talk about autism, ADHD, PDA and neurodivergent parenting.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):
00:00 – Intro & Listener Survey Feedback05:30 – Meet the Guest: Mark Holborough10:00 – The Challenges of working parents16:30 – Working from Home with neurodifferent Kids25:00 – Background chaos, interruptions and client calls33:00 – The emotional guilt of being the breadwinner40:00 – Supporting the non-working Parent53:00 – How open can you be at work?1:00:00 – Hiding a child at work: Real life stories1:07:00 – Why parents of neuro-exceptional kids make great employees1:13:00 – The economic cost of caring1:26:00 – The Positives1:29:00 – Neurodiversity Champions1:33:00 – Tiny Epic Wins1:37:00 – What the Flip? Moments1:41:00 – Wrap-up and thanks
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
Neuroshambles Listener Survey: https://forms.gle/2wFVupe4HumCYym6A
LSE Report – The Economic Case for Prioritising Autism in Policy and Reform: http://lse.ac.uk/cpec/assets/documents/Autismeconomics.pdf
The Sunflower Alliance – raising awareness of hidden disabilities: https://hdsunflower.com/
BUPA Medical Insurance: https://www.bupa.co.uk/health/health-insurance-ppc-b 
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CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles
⸻
CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com
 

To kick off Season 3, Mark welcomes back Neuroshambles favourite Heidi Mavir - bestselling author, speaker, fearless advocate and proud neurodivergent parent - for a lively and cathartic deep dive into swearing. From F-bombs on the trampoline to grandparent-safe alternatives, they explore how language, context, and neurodivergent wiring all shape how (and why) our kids swear.
This warm and witty episode unpacks the relationship between swearing and regulation, impulse control, PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance), sensory overload, and social context. Expect plenty of laughs, the occasional C-bomb, and a ton of relatable chaos for anyone raising autistic, ADHD, or otherwise differently-wired kids.
Whether you’re a proudly sweary household or struggling to police your neurodivergent child's potty-mouth moments, this episode is packed with nuance, honesty, and a surprising amount of empathy - even for those who hate bad language.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):
00:00 - Welcome Back & Meet the Guest: Heidi Mavir03:00 - School Turbulence, Burnout & Finding Your Flow08:00 - Why Swearing Is This Week’s Topic12:00 - What Is a Swear Word Anyway?18:00 - Swearing, Context & Cultural Taboos25:00 - Family Rules: “Nana Swears” vs “F-Bombs at Home”33:00 - Parenting Through Swearing: Where Do You Draw the Line?41:00 - PDA, Equalising Behaviour & Rage Rooms50:00 - When the Swears Are Aimed at You58:00 - Swearing as a Self-Regulation Strategy1:03:00 - Should We Be Policing Swearing at All?1:12:00 - Swearing and Impulse Control in ADHD1:17:00 - Teaching Context Without Policing Expression1:25:00 - Workarounds, Wordplay & Sweary Shenanigans1:30:00 – Tiny Epic Wins1:35:00 – What the Flip? Moments1:40:00 - Wrap-Up & Where to Find Heidi
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
Heidi Mavir website - https://www.heidimavir.com/
Heidi’s “Your child is not broken” book - https://amzn.eu/d/cjoih9W
Eliza Fricker “Can’t not won’t” book - https://amzn.eu/d/91m7voc
PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance) - https://www.pdasociety.org.uk/what-is-pda/
“F*ck you I won’t do what you tell me”, song lyric by Rage Against The Machine - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWXazVhlyxQ
Lindsay McGlone - https://www.instagram.com/rollinwithlindsay_/
Reclaimed Means Business - https://lindsaymcglone.kartra.com/page/RMB2025
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CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles
⸻
CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

In this season finale, Mark welcomes back the brilliant Lisa Galley (@school_run_mum_autism), who is an autism family consultant, ex-speech and language therapist, and mum of three grown-up autistic humans. 
Together, they discuss how the summer holidays are a very different experience for parents of neurodifferent kids and why the concept of a “relaxing summer” is more often myth than reality.
Touching on the common parental feelings of boredom, guilt and the ever-present FOMO, this is a candid, humorous and occasionally insightful look at what we're going to be experiencing over the summer when it seems like we're house-bound with our autistic, ADHD and PDA kids.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):
00:00 - Intro & Meet the Guest: Lisa Galley04:00 - Introducing the topic of the week06:30 - The burden of boredom10:00 - Dealing with guilt of not providing the "perfect" summer17:00 - The loss of spontaneity and the rampant FOMO26:30 - The unspoken impact on working parents30:00 - Attempting to go on holiday34:00 - The importance of summer holidays for our kids38:00 - Q&A: Answering listeners' summer holiday questions41:00 - Testing out home education in the summer45:00 - How to help yourself as a parent47:30 - The challenges of co-parenting in the summer holidays58:00 - Advice from listeners1:03:00 - The positives of the summer holidays1:05:00 - Neurodiversity Champions1:08:30 - Tiny Epic Wins1:11:30 - "What the Flip?" moments1:16:30 - Outro and Season Wrap-Up
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
Lisa Galley Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/school_run_mum_autism/
Parent Carer Cheerleeding Squad Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/parentcarercheerleadingsquad
Special Assistance at airports - https://www.caa.co.uk/passengers-and-public/special-assistance/accessing-special-assistance/
We're Not Your Typical Podcast - https://were-not-your-typical-podcast-258bbca3.simplecast.com/
Let’s Talk Neurodivergent Kids Podcast - https://pod.link/1442067009
Legoland Windsor Accessibility Pass - https://www.legoland.co.uk/plan-your-day/before-you-visit/accessibility/
"Holidays" episode of Neuroshambles - https://pod.link/1710455546/episode/2b5dc7973b418c9d6069ced370c409b9
"Hobbies" episode of Neuroshambles - https://pod.link/1710455546/episode/19a31193017cd7413d681ff3b36119eb
Lisa Galley's Summer Survival Guide - https://lisagalley.myflodesk.com/survival
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CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles
⸻
CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

In this episode of Neuroshambles, Mark is joined by returning guest Hatty Ashdown - not only a parent of a neurodivergent child, but also a brilliant comedian, writer and host of the Funny Mummies podcast. Together they dive into the deceptively simple but totally chaotic world of swimming.
For children with autism, ADHD, PDA, and other forms of neurodivergency, swimming can be simultaneously a magical sensory experience and an absolute logistical nightmare. From the infuriating act of trying to get them to swim in the first place, to negotiating the changing room routine, navigating the lockers and dealing with their antics in the pool, Mark and Hatty share candid and hilarious tales of what it’s like to take your neuro-exceptional brood swimming - and why we keep doing it, despite the enormous faff.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):
00:00 - Intro & Meet the Guest: Hatty Ashdown06:00 - Topic of the Week: Swimming09:00 - Why do neurodivergent kids love swimming?15:00 - The challenge of teaching neurodivergent kids to swim30:30 - The massive faff of a swimming trip: Hatty's routine37:00 - The massive faff of a swimming trip: Mark's routine42:00 - The chaos of changing rooms46:30 - The stress of the lockers53:00 - Shenanigans in the pool59:30 - Losing their goggles1:04:00 - The Positives: the joy of swimming1:08:00 - Neurodiversity champions1:12:00 - Tiny epic wins1:15:00 - What the Flip? Moments1:20:00 - Wrap-Up and Where to Find Hatty
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
• Hatty Ashdown’s Website – https://hattyashdown.com/
• Funny Mummies Podcast: Basics – https://pod.link/1451332466
• Funny Mummies Podcast: VIP (Patreon) – https://www.patreon.com/FunnyMummiesPodcast
• Bella Ramsey (Neurodiversity Champion) – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bella_Ramsey
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CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles
⸻
CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: https://pixabay.com

Following on from part 1, fan favourite Jo Matthews joins Mark once more for another laughter-filled, cathartic rant through the most mind-bogglingly ill-informed things people have said about raising autistic, ADHD, PDA and otherwise neurodivergent kids.
This one features a fresh batch of well-meaning nonsense, unsolicited advice, and flat-out offensive comments submitted by Neuroshambles listeners. It’s funny, familiar, and frighteningly relatable.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):
00:00 - Intro & Meet the Guest: Jo Matthews Returns
05:30 - "Have you tried a routine?"
10:30 - "Have you tried a parenting course?"
13:30 - “Have you tried changing their diet?”
17:00 - "Why don't you take their screens away?"
20:00 - "Does he have mild autism?"
25:30 - Good autism v bad autism
29:00 - “We’re all a bit autistic"
34:30 - "ADHD is just an excuse"
37:00 - “It doesn't define him”
41:00 - "There's nothing wrong with him"
43:00 - Medical v Social models of disability
47:30 - "My kid does that"
50:00 - “He'll eat when he's hungry"
52:30 - “He'll grow out of it"
54:30 - “He doesn't look autistic"
56:30 - “But, he can talk, so he can’t be autistic”
59:00 - “ADHD is just for boys”
1:01:30 - "What's wrong with him?"
1:02:30 - "I bet he's good at maths"
1:04:30 - "I don't know how you do it"
1:07:00 - Misguided empathy: "I know how you feel"
1:09:00 - "But I do that and I'm not autistic"
1:14:00 - The completely batshit mental comments
1:20:00 - Neurodiversity Champions
1:21:30 - Tiny Epic Wins
1:25:00 - "What the flip?" moments
1:27:30 - Wrap-up & contact info
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
The medical vs social models of disability: www.scope.org.uk/about-us/social-model-of-disability/
Autism assessments (AQ Test): www.embrace-autism.com/aq-10/#test
Bowles Outdoor Centre - www.bowles.rocks
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CONTACT US
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles
⸻
CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: https://pixabay.com

In this episode, Mark is joined once again by the brilliant Jo Matthews for a cathartic, hilarious, and occasionally sweary dive into the unfiltered reality of parenting autistic, ADHD and PDA kids.
From "It's just a label" and "He’s fine with me" to "You just need to push them out of their comfort zone", this is part one of a two-part special on the unsolicited commentary we all get, whether it’s from strangers, family members, or well-meaning-but-utterly-wrong professionals. The kind of comments that pretend to be supportive but are really just dismissive, ignorant, or unhelpfully optimistic.
Together, Mark and Jo share personal stories, listener submissions, and a few moments of pure rage-laughter, as they unpack why these statements cut so deep – and how to push back with humour, honesty, and the occasional incredulous raise of the eyebrow.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):00:00 – Intro & Meet the Guest: Jo Matthews06:00 – “It's just a label”08:00 - The story of Rube Waddell16:00 - "Stop Mollycoddling your child"21:00 - "You let them win too much"22:30 - "Can't you just make them do it?"26:00 - "You should make their home life more unpleasant"28:00 - "Your parenting is wishy washy"31:00 - "Children just need boundaries"36:00 - "You need to push them out of their comfort zone"43:00 - "Are you too afraid to say no?"48:00 - "How will they manage in the real world?"52:00 - "Sometimes, it's a choice"54:00 - "They're just trying to get their own way"01:02:00 - "They're fine when they're with me"01:07:00 - The Positives01:09:30 - Neurodiversity Champions01:12:00 - Tiny Epic Wins01:14:30 - What the Flip?01:17:00 - Wrap-Up & What’s Coming in Part Two
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
Rube Waddell - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rube_Waddell
"Am I raising an arsehole?" episode of Neuroshambles -https://pod.link/1710455546/episode/a313c1057becbcd2e24d64c5bf94820e
"The Explosive Child" book - https://drrossgreene.com/the-explosive-child.htm
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CONTACT US
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